111 pages • 3 hours read
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The green spiral notebook symbolizes Julian's search to find the meaning and purpose of his parents' death. The notebook contains random lists of things that his mother wrote. Throughout the novel, Julian carries the notebook with him, studying it, pondering the purpose of the lists, but he can't ever figure it out. In the same way that Julian doesn't understand the meaning of his mother's lists, Julian moves through his life perplexed at why his parents had to leave him. After he almost dies in the trunk from Russell's abuse, Julian is convinced he must go get his mother's notebook. The notebook is so important to him that Julian risks his safety and the safety of his friends to go back to Russell's house and search for it. As Julian finds other coping mechanisms for life, and after the threat of Russell is no more, Julian rips up the notebook.
Shoes have a special significance in this novel. They often function as a symbol of power or a lack of power. In Chapter 9, when Julian is first beginning to hang out with Adam, he feels inferior to Adam. Adam is popular with his teachers, classmates in all grades, and he's also a good student.
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