The Secret Side of Empty

Set in suburban New Jersey, Spanish-American author Maria E. Andreu’s debut young-adult and realistic fiction novel, The Secret Side of Empty (2014), revolves around Monserrat Thalia (aka M.T.), who gets straight-As in school, has a faithful best friend, Chelsea, and a cute boyfriend, Nate. However, M.T. also has a giant secret she is terrified of having exposed: she and her family are undocumented immigrants from Argentina. Living in fear of deportation and feeling a deep sense of shame and isolation, M.T. is also frightened that her closest friends will discover her true identity and no longer like her for who she is. As M.T. makes her way through senior year of high school, she faces a major crossroads when her immigration status threatens her potential college education. Andreu drew from her own personal experiences as an undocumented Spanish immigrant who came to the United States as a child. The Secret Side of Empty was a 2014 Indie Excellence Award Winner, as well as a School Library Journal Top 10 Latino Books of 2014.  Kirkus Reviews called the novel “a timely and powerful portrait of the American dream deferred.”

Narrated in the first person perspective by seventeen-year-old Monserrat Thalia (M.T.), the story begins in contemporary New Jersey. From the outside, M.T. appears to be a typical American teenager. She is popular, has blondish hair, fair skin, and attends a prestigious Catholic school where she is vice president of the National Honor Society. However, M.T., who wants everyone to forget her “real” name, harbors a major secret. M.T. and her family members were born in Argentina and now live in the U.S. illegally as undocumented immigrants. The illegal status of M.T.’s family dictates every aspect of their lives, including M.T.’s school enrollment, and her father’s inability to keep a legitimate job and save enough money to move the family back to Argentina. Fortunately, the Catholic school M.T. attends does not require a birth certificate for registration, making it easier for M.T. to forget her family secret and blend in as a typical American. Not even M.T.’s wealthy best friend since kindergarten, Chelsea, knows her identity. One of the people that help M.T. keep going is her little brother, Jose, who, ten years younger than she, loves SpongeBob SquarePants. Jose helps M.T. laugh when all hope seems lost. The other person that makes M.T. the happiest is her first boyfriend, Nate, a cute boy she has started dating after he asked her out via Facebook. Nate is also unaware of M.T.’s secret, adding to the mounting pressure and sense of isolation M.T. feels as the story unfolds.

As senior year of high-school progresses, M.T. finds it harder to keep her secret. Watching her friends make plans for college and life after high school makes M.T. think that she has no future. Unable to obtain a driver’s license or get a legal job, she feels as if college is an impossible wish she can never fulfill. Without legal documentation, M.T. cannot be accepted to university despite her excellent academic standing. M.T. is depressed at the thought of her bleak future. Every time she thinks she is ready to share her secret, the thought of her family being deported back to Argentina keeps her quiet. Nate soon senses M.T.’s unhappiness, causing a rift in their relationship. As time passes, Chelsea continues to mention college prospects, which irks M.T. so much, she cuts Chelsea out of her life. M.T. is so despondent at one point she contemplates suicide. M.T.’s home life worsens matters, as her relationship with her bitter and physically abusive father remains strained throughout the story; her mother is too timid to do much about it. M.T. is reluctant to report her father’s violent behavior to the police for fear of being discovered as illegal and sent back to Argentina.



As more time passes, M.T. can no longer hide her depression. She begins to cut class, believing the high-school diploma she worked so hard to obtain will be useless for her future. Later, when M.T. lies on the road without a care of being hit by a car, a rival classmate, Quinn, pulls her to safety. Chelsea confronts M.T. about her depression, and M.T. finally tells her long-held secret to Chelsea. M.T. explains how scared she is of not having the same future options as her legal American classmates. M.T. admits how terrified she is of being ripped from the only country she has known as home. When M.T. confesses she has been contemplating suicide, Chelsea responds, “M, promise me you’re going to be okay.” Chelsea considers calling the police to protect M.T. from harming herself, but she knows that the police could possibly discover that M.T.’s family is illegal and have them deported back to Argentina. As a result, Chelsea opts not to call the police, thereby honoring M.T.’s secret.

After finally exposing her secret, M.T. accepts herself for who she is, feeling better as a result. In doing so, M.T. is touched to learn that Chelsea and Nate do not think differently of her, but still, love her for exactly who she is. Regarding her suicidal thoughts, M.T tells her friends that she didn’t really want to die, but rather, “I wanted to stop. You know! My life, I mean. The way it was. Like I had no future. Not a future like you guys, anyway. Because I am an illegal immigrant.” While letting out her secret lifts a tremendous weight off M.T.’s shoulders, she knows the difficulty of legally obtaining documentation awaits her in the future. However, the strength, determination, and resilience she has demonstrated during her senior year of high school have hopefully provided M.T. with the tools to attain the American dream and become a successful U.S. citizen one day.