“It was the dawn of the era of the unicorns: startups valued, by their investors, at over a billion dollars. A prominent venture capitalist had declared in the op-ed pages of an international business newspaper that software was eating the world, a claim that was subsequently cited in countless pitch decks and press releases and job listings as if it were proof of something—as if it were not just a clumsy and unpoetic metaphor, but evidence. Outside of Silicon Valley, there seemed to be an overall resistance to taking any of it too seriously. There was a prevailing sentiment that, just like the last bubble, this would eventually pass. Meanwhile, the industry expanded beyond the province of futurists and hardware enthusiasts, and settled into its new role as the scaffolding of everyday life.”

Wiener sets the opening scene and tone with grandiose language that captures the point of view of tech leaders and founders. Here she acknowledges the discrepancy between the high aspirations and optimism of industry insiders and the skepticism of outsiders. She acknowledges that, despite skepticism, by the time her story begins, the industry and its products have already insinuated themselves into the structure of peoples’ daily lives.

“What was my value? Five times as much as our new office sofa; twenty orders of customized stationery. While my future peers were hiring wealth advisers and going on meditation retreats in Bali to pursue self-actualization, I was vacuuming roaches off the walls of my rental apartment, smoking weed, and bicycling to warehouse concerts along the East River, staving off a thrumming sense of dread.”

Questions of value—both in terms of self-worth and aesthetic, cultural, and social value—drive Wiener toward the tech industry, out of a stagnant position in the shrinking publishing industry. This passage crystallizes her core anxiety: Unable to define her own worth, she begins to seek validation via salary, social status, and a sense of social relevance or higher purpose.

“I sat in [the interviewer’s] wake, wondering what I was waiting for. There was not a doubt in my mind that I would not get the job. Not only had I surely demonstrated that I was unemployable, but I felt certain I’d been a vivid caricature of the dotty, linty liberal arts major—the antithesis of all that the tech industry stood for. Still, though the interviews had been inane, they only served to fuel me. Here was a character flaw on parade, my industry origin story: I had always responded well to negging.”

Early in the narrative Wiener demonstrates a habit of appraising herself through the eyes of others. After enduring an absurd interview that resembled hazing, Wiener reveals that the subtle disrespect of the exercise motivated her further. With humor and painful self-awareness, her narration admits that this trait—in her eyes, a flaw—is part of what drives her to stay in the industry.