In this chapter, Cooper and Howe examine upper-class New York society during the Gilded Age and how the Vanderbilt family began to fit into it. For a time, the Vanderbilts were shut out of it completely, as they were not part of the group of old families who had dominated New York society since the Dutch era. The Commodore himself was fabulously wealthy but crude and uneducated; he made no attempt to ingratiate himself into this group. His children and grandchildren did, however, and Chapters 4 and 5 tell how they went about gaining entrance.

After the Civil War, two people came to dictate who “belonged” to New York society—and who did not. One was Caroline Astor, born to an old Dutch family and the wife of William Astor Jr., a member of the wealthy Astor family. The other, Ward McAllister, was not a member of New York society himself but rather an arbiter of Old World taste and sophistication. He had traveled widely in Europe, making “a careful study of all aspects of social life: court manners, architecture, fashion, food, drink, watering spots, dances” (76). These he imparted to Caroline Astor, and together they determined who should be the ruling members of New York society.